Closure

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As I sit down on the roof tonight
The heartache of having hurt someone I love
Becomes my only companion apart from the moon
But it doesn't take much for the wind to cheer me up
She tries her best to ruffle my hair, tickle me with my clothes
But my stupid heart, yearns for the one with whom I can't talk
My brain locking down those feelings,
Keeping my heart hostage
Tells it, you've done more than enough to hurt her
If you say so much as word again, she'll break down
And then they'll be no one to miss
There comes a tear to give me a kiss
Wind still not giving up, she tries to wipe off that tear,
Reminding me of what true love is
And i get lost in the memories of she had loved me,
I crumble under my own weight, wanting to reverse time
tik-tok tik-tok clicks my watch,
bringing me back to the reality,
where there are rules, where i can't go visit her again
where i can't hear her laughter or her cute yelling
And she won't lift me up again
Knowing what I've gotten myself into
knowing that no matter what i do it's all over now
Sobbing, I look up, even the Moon is red now,
He knows what i'm going through,
after seeing me every night missing her,
He's decided that things will change,
it may be slow, or even rare
But things will change,
With a ray of hope i start consoling myself
Putting on an inspirational song
I change my mind instead of punishing myself
Patting myself i say to myself "I'm sorry"
Somehow the tears start again,
but this time it's not sadness
I'm finally accepting my mistakes
And I acknowledge that I exist and I matter 
realisation dawns upon me
Everyone else comes later
I'll love myself first
Coz if I cease to exist,
who will love the ones I hold dear ?  

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